summer is really picking up! both jane and laura have enjoyed time at cabins with friends and families up north in minnesota, so excuse our little time away from the blog last week. our next post will feature a party that we threw to wish our friend kayla goodbye and good luck as she moves to north carolina next week. however, we wanted a separate post just to talk about things we learned from saying goodbye to a close friend and friendship in general.
“rare as is true love, friendship is rarer.” -jean de la fontaine. this quote really hit it home for me. i consider myself very blessed; i have an education, a personality, clothes, technology, a house, etc. but when counting my blessings i find that most of them are the people in my life. this year, i began to realize how extraordinary my relationships with those i call my friends are. i don’t mean to be insincere when i say that we’ve been through a lot because, trust me i could give you hundreds of examples, but those hard times, i believe, should be addressed,but not to the point where they hold one back from happiness. hard times and good times are very difficult to compare as they are so different, but both are in similar in that they help to make one who they truly are and bring people together. i met kayla the summer before freshman year and enjoyed getting to know her better as we shared many dinner dates, movie marathons, and study sessions. it’s really weird to think of going back to school next year and not having her in my classes or at our lunch table. i’m really going to miss her and that will hit me even more next year when i need help with studying or just someone to vent to because kayla was always there for that. i’m positive that she will find new friends and lots of happiness in north carolina (and warmer weather!!) but her role in our group of friends could never be replaced. kayla, i’ll miss you (already do), thank you for all the advice and support you have given to me. your kindness and caring attitude have inspired me and many others. please come visit soon- love you. -laura
similar to laura, this year was a major turning point for me in my understanding and witnessing of true friendship. until recently, i defined friendship as the relationship i had with those who i enjoyed, could be myself around, and felt closest to. this is all still very true, except i have expanded this definition into much more. friendship is genuine, embracing, and intentional. friendships not only have to be genuine in that you should feel comfortable being yourself in your friendships, but they also include genuine care. this care shows through in different ways amongst my friends. for some, it means picking up the phone and genuinely wanting to check in. (facetime or call always!…. so much realer than texting) for others, its adding a good laugh in a conversation, telling a fun story, or a pick-me-up treat to ensure a friends overall happiness and well being and caring about this. friendship is embracing the differences. from early on, we are taught that everyone is unique are no two people will be the same. when i look at my closest friends i see a group of people with completely different, yet complimentary, interests, personalities, styles, lifestyles, stories, etc. (it’s amazing how such different people can have the closest relationships- opposites do attract!) … but all embracing these differences in a way the each individual person has their own vital contribution to the friendship and both learns from and opens the eyes of their friends. lastly, friendship is intentional; “a for effort” is everything in a true friendship. the intentions have to be good and one hundred percent there. the person i know who’s intentions are always genuine and in the right place is kayla. her intentions are to make others feel good, laugh, but not at the expense of others, to be inclusive, and kind. kayla, thank you for being such a good friend to me and everyone else all these years, (since third grade!) thank you for the memories, being the best listener, helping me realize what true friendship is and exemplifying this. i will miss you so much, and i know everyone in nc will love yo as much as we do. i refuse to say goodbye, so this is purely a “see you later alligator!” xo – jane